discipleship

Christian Marriage in Scripture

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In biblical cultures, the celebration of marriage was not a religious rite but a festival of common life involving family, friends, and community. Although Scripture contains some poetry for use in marriage celebrations (Song of Songs, Psalm 45), it does not describe marriage as a religious ceremony. However, in both the Old and New Testaments the institution of marriage is viewed as sacramental, as a symbol of the relationship between the Lord and the covenant community.

Christ’s Headship in the Marriage Covenant

The covenant of marriage is a mutual commitment not only to create a life of equal partnership but also to nurture and sustain. When a man and a woman covenant in Christian marriage, therefore, they commit themselves mutually to create rules of behavior that will nurture and sustain the marriage resulting from their covenant. For committed Christians, those rules are found by paying careful attention to their tradition.

The letter to the Ephesians provides scriptural rules for the living out of the marriage covenant. Its writer inherits a list of household duties traditional in the time and place. He critiques the cultural assumption of inequality in this list and instructs all Christians to “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” (Eph. 5:21). This critique challenges the absolute authority of any one Christian group over another, of husbands over wives for instance. It establishes as the basic attitude required of all Christians, even in marriage, an awe of Christ and a giving way to one another because of this.

As all Christians are to give way one to another, it is hardly surprising that a wife is to give way to her husband, “as to the Lord” (Eph. 5:22). There is a surprise, however, in the instruction given to husbands, at least for those husbands who see themselves as lord and master of their wives and who appeal to the letter to the Ephesians to support this perspective. The instruction is not that the husband is the head of the wife, which is the preferred male reading, but that “the husband is the head of the wife as [that is, in the same way as] Christ is the head of the church” (Eph. 5:23). How does Christ act as head of the church? The writer answers: “[He] gave himself up for her” (Eph. 5:25). It is an echo of a self-description that Jesus offers in Mark’s gospel: “The Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve” (Mark 10:45).

The Christ-way to exercise authority is to serve. Jesus constantly pointed out to his power-hungry disciples that in his kingdom a leader is one who serves (Luke 22:26). A husband who wishes to be head over his wife, or a wife who wishes to be head over her husband, in the way that Christ is head over the church, will be head by serving, by giving himself or herself up for the other.

Christlike headship is not absolute control of another human being. It is not making decisions and passing them on to another to be carried out. It is not reducing another human being to the status of chattel. To be head as Christ is head is to serve. The Christian head is called always to be the servant of others. As Markus Barth says beautifully, the Christian husband-head becomes “the first servant of his wife” (Ephesians: Translation and Commentary on Chapters 4–6 [Garden City, NY: Doubleday, 1974], p. 618), and she becomes his first servant. One rule of behavior for the nurturing and sustaining of the covenant of Christian marriage is the rule of mutual service.

The letter to the Ephesians embraces another rule for behavior in Christian marriage, a great Jewish and Christian commandment: “Love your neighbor as yourself” (Lev. 19:18; Mark 12:31). Husbands are instructed that they “ought to love their wives as [or, for they are] their own bodies” (Eph. 5:28), and that the husband “who loves his wife loves himself” (Eph. 5:28). We can assume the same instruction is intended also for a wife. The Torah and gospel injunction to love one’s neighbor as oneself applies in Christian marriage. As all Christians are to give way to one another and to love one another so also are the spouses in a Christian marriage. The rules of Christian behavior that will respect, nurture, and sustain the covenant and the community of marriage are easy to articulate: love of one’s neighbor-spouse as oneself, love that is giving way, love that is mutual service, love that is abiding.

A Christian marriage is not just a wedding ceremony to be celebrated. It is also a loving and equal partnership of life to be lived. When they covenant in marriage, Christian spouses commit themselves to explore together in their married life the religious depth of their existence and to respond to that depth in light of the Christian faith.

Discipleship in Christian Marriage

One of the most central affirmations of the Christian faith is the affirmation of discipleship. A disciple is an ever-present New Testament word, occurring some 250 times throughout the Gospels and Acts and always implying response to a call from the Lord. By definition disciples are learners, and the disciples of Christ are learners of mystery. They gather to explore together a triple mystery: the mystery of the one God who loves them and seeks to be loved by them; the mystery of the Christ in whom this God is revealed and whom God raised from the dead (1 Cor. 15:4; Acts 2:24); the mystery of the church in which they gather and which is the body of Christ (Eph. 1:22–23; Col. 1:18, 24). Spouses in a covenant marriage are called to be disciples of these mysteries and of their implications for their married life together.

Christian marriage does not separate spouses from life. It immerses them in life and confronts them with the ultimate questions of life and of death that are the stuff of religion. There are questions of joy in love and loving and the birth of new life; of pain in illness and suffering and alienation; of grief and fear in loneliness and isolation and death; of happiness in friends and beauty and success. Marriage demands that sense be made of these competing questions and many others like them. Christian marriage demands that sense be made of them in light of the shared Christian faith of the spouses.

As they find together adequate responses to the demands their married life imposes on them, Christian spouses mutually nurture one another into Christian discipleship. They learn together and they grow together in Christian maturity. The more they mature, the more they come to realize the ongoing nature of becoming married and of becoming a covenant sign. They come to realize that, though their marriage is already a sign of the covenant between Christ and his church, it is not yet the best sign it can be and is called to be. In Christian marriage, which is a life of ongoing Christian discipleship, even more than in secular marriage, the answer to the question of when two people are married is simple: thirty, forty, even fifty years later.

Christian Marriage As Sacrament

Religions are always on the lookout for the images of God and of God’s relationship to the human world. In the Jewish prophets, we find an action image, known as the prophetic symbol. Jeremiah, for instance, buys an earthen pot, dashes it to the ground before a puzzled crowd, and explains to them what it is he is doing. “This is what the Lord Almighty says: I will smash this nation and this city just as this potter’s jar is smashed” (Jer. 19:11).

The prophet clarifies the radical meaning of his actions, which clarifies the radical meaning of a prophetic symbol. As Jeremiah shattered his pot, so God shatters Jerusalem. The depth, meaning, and reality symbolized by Jeremiah is not the shattering of a cheap pot but the shattering of Jerusalem and of the covenant relationship between Yahweh and Yahweh’s people. The prophetic symbol is a representative action, that is, an action that proclaims makes explicit, and celebrates in representation some other, more fundamentally meaningful reality.

Since the idea of their special relationship to Yahweh arising out of their mutual covenant was so central to the self-understanding of the Israelites, it is easy to predict that they would search out a human reality to symbolize the covenant relationship. It is equally easy, perhaps, to predict that the reality they would choose is the mutual covenant that is marriage. The prophet Hosea was the first to act in and speak of marriage as the prophetic symbol of the covenant.

At a superficial level, the marriage of Hosea and Gomer was like many other marriages. But at a deeper level, Hosea interpreted it as a prophetic symbol, proclaiming, making humanly explicit, and celebrating in representation, the covenant union between Yahweh and Israel. As Gomer left Hosea for other lovers, so also did Israel leave Yahweh for other gods. As Hosea waited for Gomer to return to him, and as he took her back without recrimination when she did return, so also did Yahweh with Israel. Hosea’s human action is a prophetic symbol, a representative image, of God’s divine action, an abiding love despite every provocation. In both covenants, the human and the divine, the covenant relationship had been violated. But Hosea’s action both mirrors and reveals Yahweh’s abiding love. It proclaims, makes explicit, and celebrates not only Hosea’s faithfulness to his marriage covenant but also Yahweh’s faithfulness to Israel.

One basic meaning about Hosea and Yahweh is clear: Each is steadfastly faithful. There is also a clear, if mysterious, meaning about marriage. Besides being a universal human institution, it is also a religious and prophetic symbol proclaiming, making explicit, and celebrating in the human world the abiding union of Yahweh and Yahweh’s people. Lived into this perspective, living into faith as we might say today, marriage becomes a two-tiered reality. On one level it bespeaks the mutual covenant love of this man and this woman; on another, it represents and symbolizes the covenant love of Yahweh and Yahweh’s people. First articulated by the prophet Hosea, this two-tiered view of marriage becomes the Christian view of marriage that we have found in the letter to the Ephesians. Jewish prophetic symbol becomes ultimately Christian sacrament, through which the church, the body of Christ, proclaims, makes explicit, and celebrates in representation that presence and action of God which is called grace.

To say that Christian marriage is a sacrament is to say that it is a prophetic symbol, a reality that has two tiers. On one tier it proclaims and makes explicit and celebrates the intimate community of life and love between a Christian man and a Christian woman. On another deeper tier, the religious and symbolic tier, it proclaims and makes explicit and celebrates the intimate community of life and love between Yahweh and Yahweh’s people and between Christ and Christ’s people, the church.

Discipling Worship Leadership

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Worship is central because God is supreme. Most believers acknowledge this. But if worship is central to all of life because God is supreme, then it clearly follows that discipling the worship leaders themselves should be strategic and high priority.  Correct?

Tragically though, things are just not that way, Few pastors and other church leaders give any intentional and specialized effort to discipling worship leaders.  Yet something good seems to be bubbling up.

This article assumes the LORD is doing something new in the hearts of Church leaders: giving some a new desire to gather artistic Kingdom servants into their congregations, and disciple them for His service; especially for the service of facilitating innovative gathered worship. So, this paper looks to offer church leaders six principles that, if followed, will GATHER artistic worship leaders into their congregations, and accelerate releasing them into His service of worship.

Here is a simple way to remember these six principles: pastor or mission leader must G A T H E R artists; intentionally, regularly, and repeatedly. Let us unpack what we mean by G A T H E R.

First ministry leaders need to intentionally GROW their own GROUP of artistic worship leaders. To start, put out the word that you intend to focus on artists and creatives in your network, congregation, or ministry. Gather them, specifically and often. For example, plan a dinner party or dessert meeting: artists like parties just like everyone else.

But you might ask, “So if I call a meeting for creatives, what do we do once they come?” The answer is simple: affirm them. Do three things. One, Ask them to bring an example of their art-making with them; and let them know they may be a few minutes for each person to let the others at the gathering see their work.

Two, give each one of them fifteen minutes to tell their story. Listen to them. Ask them questions like, “How has God wired you artistically?” “What artistic dreams has God put in your heart?” “What artistic things has God put in your heart to do?” Any questions like that.

And three: After you have let them share their story a bit, gather around them, and pray for them. Activities like these have a very special impact on artists—regardless of the denominational background the person has if any. They will feel appreciated and very thankful. Gathering musicians, artists, and creatives in your sphere of relationship will jumpstart the growth of your own group of these God-designed specialists.

Second, ADVOCATE for the creatives in your ministry context. Unfortunately, within the Body of Christ, there exist several typical but incorrect attitudes toward artists. Often leadership simply does not think to involve them. Or some leaders presume artists are counter-culture critics, standing outside the general flow of the community and their church.[1]Or, some hold a secular humanist notion that “the arts” are abstract activities and objects of creative expression; and that those artistic objects and activities are only for contemplation or entertainment. All these notions cut against the biblical understanding of artistic creativity and the biblical role of the craftsmen specialists who specialize in creating the environments wherein God actually comes and meets with his believing community.

Therefore artistic Christians need non-artistic advocates who both admire what they do, and affirm the importance of their contributions to Christ’s Body.  These Arts Advocates are strategically helpful, especially if well received in the artist’s congregation, especially helping congregational leaders discover their strategic, powerful, and beautiful contribution. Also, Arts Advocates can help the artistic Christian understand themselves, their important role in leading the congregation into touching transcendent connection with GOD Himself; and their specialty of dealing with the mysterious realities of the Human Community’s God-designed transcendence.

Many a church leader is more a Modernist than a Biblicist. That is, the wonderful Reformation-press to get the Word of God into the hands of everyday people, and it’s press for them to understand the objective truth about God it reveals, has a dark side. The dark side was, and still is, the drift towards Modernism and Rationalism: Church leaders putting an emphasis on information rather than encounter; an emphasis on biblical reasoning about God over the biblical priority of relating to God.[2]

So, one key challenge for Protestants is to regain an appreciation of the ways God reveals His reality and His Truth within the contexts of beauty and through our participation in the transcendence-toughing beautiful activities (metaphors, symbols, and human activities of worship) we call liturgies. And non-artistic Arts Advocates play a strategic role for both the artist and general church leadership in all of this.[3]

Directive three? Church leaders must TOUCH the artist OVER extended periods of TIME. Worship practitioners are at heart, artists; those God’s designed as human-emotion-and-imagination specialists. Church leaders must not only understand this reality; they have to see the value of emotional and imaginal intelligence, and how those dynamics sync with intellectual intelligence. Then they must appreciate the specialists (artists) who God has provided to lead the Church-gathered (in line with Scripture) into those contexts.[4]

Artists and creatives need stable, virtuous, caring, and safe relationships; a community of believers wherein they are appreciated, but also can have normal healthy and regular involvement.[5]

Therefore, especially these days when mainstream culture has left the Age of the Orator and entered the Age of the Artist[6] it is strategically important for Christian leaders to develop relationships with the artists in their network of relationships; intentionally and consistently. This sort of regular, appreciative and encouraging touch by Christian leaders will result in many artists growing in Christ, and moving more directly into ministry—simply because you have been one of the few Christian leaders who gave them real relationship.

Directive four is HONOR the artist.  Honoring the art-maker is much different than flattering or pandering to them (catering to them in order to simply exploit their talents for the sake of your ministry). Honoring them must be done in truth. Insincerity will be picked up immediately. They will feel used, and ultimately will be put off, and most often leave. To legitimately honor the artistic dimension of your congregation or ministry you must go public. The honoring dynamic submitted here is very similar to the biblical definition of praise—to publicly acknowledge the value and virtues of the person and their work. Anything else will encourage some sort of vain conceit or selfish ambition in the artist or the discipler (see Philippians 2:3; or James 3:14, 16). Rather we encourage true and honest appreciation of the person’s creative capacities and honed skills. If a potential discipler holds an honest appreciation for an artist’s capacities and skills, they will find public places and times where honoring them is natural, balanced, and appropriate.[7]

ENCOURAGE the artists around you is the fifth directive. The tragic truth, most artists are not encouraged by the churches they attend![8] However, when one realizes the biblical purpose for artistic expression specialists (like Bezalel and Oholiab; Ex 35:30-36:3)—to create the environments of worship wherein believers actually touch the transcendent mysterious reality of interaction with God—they will encourage artists.

Artistic Christians must be encouraged to carry out their artistic stewardships in their congregations. They must be loved into applying their artistic skills creatively to the life of their local parish. But that will not happen unless leadership invites them. Therefore church and mission leaders must become proactive at encouraging artist-believers to get involved.[9] Prayerfully ask the LORD to give you meaningful, legitimate ways to encourage these creatives; and you will gather artists to you and ministry context.

Finally, the sixth directive to Christian leaders concerning artists is to RESOURCE them. In order to see artistic Christians become more productive as general believers, and as specialized Kingdom servants in our churches and missions work, Christian leadership must resource them in at least five ways: Ministry Vision, Pastoral Permission, Direct Discipleship, Ministry Structures, and in many cases Finances. These resource areas are key to envisioning and they enabling artistic-ministry-initiators to actually venture out in ministry—especially into the community at large.

Conclusion

Regretfully very few artistic Christians become the recipients of such a GATHERing embrace. But if you do repeatedly and prayerfully practice efforts to GROW your our group of artists, ADVOCATE for artistic Christians, TOUCH artists regularly and legitimately, HONOR artists for the beauty of their role in leading others into touching the transcendent things of God and life, ENCOURAGE them to move forward in their biblical assignment to work out their God-designed artistic assignments (Phil 2:12-13), and RESOURCE them with Ministry Vision, Pastoral Permission, Direct Discipleship, Ministry Structures, and Finances; then you will disciple scores of worship leaders, who will in turn dynamically release God’s truth, beauty, goodness, and forgiveness in ways most congregations and ministries dream about, but only a few seem to accomplish.

[1]  In fact, that notion is not historically the case.  Most often throughout history, the creatives have been the voice, the heart-expressions OF the community or culture.  God made artistic people—who the Bible labels craftsmen: people unusually wise at imaginative design and expression—for the purpose of leading people and human communities into touching the transcendent realities of life and God (my own definition of an artist and the biblical role of artists).  Throughout the history of human communities, the artistic specialists have expressed and reflected the core values, perspectives, rituals, celebrations, and liturgies of those communities.  I actually hold the conviction that is still actually true these days but would take much more space to discuss.

[2][2]  This dark side of the Reformation/Protestant movement also includes a pressing against interacting with the mysteries of our relationship with God (in awe, reverence, humility, silence, and such) “experienced” in a context that relies on the imaginal and emotional dynamics of intelligence as much at the dynamic of our intellectual intelligence, while pressing for biblical reasoning about God.  Many problems within the Protestant movement have developed out of these emphases—which this article is far too short to address.

[3]  Advocates see the importance of the artistic dimension of life and of the artistic specialists who lead the rest of the church and general community into touching and entering into these transcendent environments where the mysterious transactions occur.  In fact, in today’s mainstream culture, if Christian leaders do not make it clear the Church is concerned about things beautiful, mysterious and transcendent—and demonstrate how the Christian Scriptures speak to these realities, and to our that daily walk with God, the Gospel will have great difficulty in seeming relevant to daily life and living.

[4]  So when church leaders grasp the interplay of the intellect, the emotions, and the imagination; perhaps they will recognize how much they need these human-emotion-and imagination specialists.  Perhaps then too they will see the value—for themselves as well as for their congregations—of spending time touching these creative-types.  If “ creatives” feel” and the appreciation that goes with time and touch from these leaders, then they will respond with an over-and-above investment of their God-designed strengths into congregational ministry.

[5]  Unfortunately, often in our churches, artists have not felt safe; nor have they felt encouraged to be who God made them be—artistic and innovative.  Actually Protestant church leaders over the last 150 or 200 years have actually considered involvement in the arts ‘worldly’ and have spent a good deal of effort discouraging artistically-gifted Christians from developing their gifts, let alone applying those skills and aptitudes to the life and ministries of our churches.  Actually, some would say that the artistic specialist has been faced with much suspicion and mistrust in the Protestant Church for its entire 500-year history.  There are some good historical reasons why Protestant leadership has inadvertently developed these “feelings” towards the artists in its midst—maybe with the exception of musicians.  But again this article is too short to try to deal with those realities.  For some overview of these issues reference texts like Protestant Worship by James F. White, or Protestant Church Music: A History by Friedrich Blume, (1974).   Also for help on a biblical role of the arts see Art in Action: Toward a Christian Aesthetic by Nicholas Wolterstorff, (1980).

[6]  This ‘observation’ that mainstream culture has left the Age of the Orator and entered the Age of the Artist, could not possibly be original to me.  But I do know I have been seeing this reality for some time, and do not recall reading that particular phrase in the writings of others.  It has simply been an observation I have made for some years now.,  What I’m trying to say here is this:  as far as I know that phrase, ‘left the Age of the Orator and entered the Age of the Artist,’ seems to be a phrase that has bubbled up out of me over the years; I’m not quoting someone else as far as I know.  Though I’m certain that many writers, thinkers, and teachers have helped me see that reality.

[7]  In my own congregation, frequently the pastor brings up to the platform a writer, a painter, an actor, a songwriter, or some other creative person and praises them for some project; often the pastor does this spontaneously and with no motive to get something from that artist; except to praise and honor them for what God has done in and through them.  How do you think that sort of action does, not just to honor that artist, but to honor the entire artistic dimension in humanity, and more specifically in the Body of Christ.

[8] Collard, Dianne B.  “The Role of Visual Art in the (Free) Evangelical Churches in Germany and Spain.” DMissiology diss., Biola University, 2004.  This thesis specifically on the role of the visual artists in the churches of Germany and Spain. 

In Dr. Collard’s study, she discovered that most often church and mission leaders rarely think that there is any way artistic Christians can make a strategic contribution to ministry strategy or programming.  In fact, the study in question pointed out that after some time, the artists in one region of Europe actually left the church; whereas the artists in another region simply resigned themselves to applying none of their artistic capacities to the contexts of their local congregations. 

[9]  In fact, those leaders must actually encourage the artistic specialists to imagine how the congregation could worship better, learn God’s Word better, disciple better and engage the non-believing community better—and then actually follow their lead. 

Encouragement of artists is absolutely critical to effective living, not to mention effective ministry.  But how can you encourage artists and creatives?  Four suggestions.  Request to experience some of their art-making.  See it, read it, receive it; experience some of their art-making. 

Whether you actually like it or not, receive what they want you to receive, see, or experience.  Listen to them.  Listen to their story, their situation, their history—and in the process don’t try to immediately fix them.  Just listen.  Invite them to keep you posted on their situation.  Directly and publically affirm them. 

I live in the Nashville TN region.  We have many artists involved in our church community.  At my own church, my pastor often brings up onto the platform any artist who has achieved some sort of milestone—an article published, a CD released, a book published, a commercial done—honored them publically, prayed for them, and asks the congregation to affirm them; whether or not their particular milestone is religious or mainstream in nature.  The pastor’s practice seems to be tremendously affirming, both for the particular artist and for other artists in general.

Foundational Discipleship: Four Biblical Habits All Disciples Practice

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The four Gospels articulate four foundational habits the LORD Jesus Himself practiced that He advocated for the first disciples: 
1)  A daily companioning worship walk with God (where prayer and conversation with God are givens and frequent);
2)  Daily meeting God in His Scriptures (the Word);
3)  Daily connecting with supportive relationships (fellowship) with fellow believers; and,
4)  Daily serving others on God’s behalf (serving).

These four habitual practices seem to be foundational for all believers, regardless of their unique and customized assignments.  Therefore, it should go without saying:  especially for those who God assigns to lead His congregation in the important and central activities of gathered congregational worship, that they  should set their sights on developing these life-long habits to a deep and central level in their own lives.

Pastor Grant Edwards of Fellowship Christian Church of Springfield, Ohio uses the more traditional terms for these four foundational practices:  prayer, Word, fellowship, service.[1] What follows is an application of these four principles to the discipleship process of worship leadership:

First, a daily companioning worship walk with God, where prayer and conversation with God are givens and frequent, is essential for anyone leading public worship.  It is the first foundation habit of every healthy disciple..  Any worship leader that does not develop such a companioning-worship-walk with the LORD will almost assuredly end up repeatedly placing most emphasis in their worship ministry on performance, production and administration.  And, the result will be just that:  performance with little congregational participation; entertainment of people without much congregational encounter of God. The worship leader should intend to talk with the LORD throughout the day more than you talk with anyone else. The result of this kind of lifestyle produces a disciple focused on companioning with Christ; demonstrating the character of Christ in daily living, and embracing the commands of Christ.

Jesus demonstrated this sort of companioning worship walk. Even as a child, Jesus was unusually well versed in the Hebrew Scriptures. FIRST,  He “. . . grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men” (Luke 2:52); and, Second, (where Jesus, as a 12-year-old boy was left in Jerusalem, and was found three days later amazing everyone there at the Temple by “understanding and answers” (Luke 2:47). Apparently, Jesus spent much private time in the Scriptures. 

Publically,  Jesus repeatedly indicates that He spent much time interacting with the Father; listening to Him, hearing from Him, and interacting with Him.[2] Jesus’ companioning-worship-walk with The Father is the model every disciple may follow. 

His worship-walk with God is completely in line with other biblical role models: Able was a righteous man (Heb. 11:4); Enoch walked with God (Gen. 5:24); Noah walked with God (Gen. 6:9); King David was a “man after God’s own heart (1 Sam. 13:14 & Acts 13:22);  Joseph was a righteous man (Mt. 1:19); the Apostles had been “with Jesus” (Acts 4:13).

Certainly, the true disciple must develop a life of prayer but, the real disciple is one who “companions” with God through Christ, conversing all through each day; leaning into Him, interacting with Him, listening for Him and to Him—while living out His dynamics and directions in the crucible of everyday living. The specialized ministry leaders who lead their congregations into gathered worship must practice developing that sort conversational, dynamic, companioning-worship-walk with Him.

Jesus also demonstrated an understanding of the principles of companioning, character imitation, and obedience when he says to “the woman at the well” in John 4: “Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks.” Jesus is underscoring the fact that worship at its core is an inner spiritual transaction and not an outward, ritualistic transaction. Worship happens in the inner world, in the spiritual dimension of a person. Jesus underscores this by not capitalizing the term spirit. Jesus is making an application to the inner world of an individual and interacting with God in the realm of the spiritual, not, per se, in the realm of the physical.

Second, Jesus’ use of the term truth in this passage is not talking about the Truth of God’s Word. Rather he is talking about the reality that worship is a lived-out life transaction.

The Apostle John uses the term truth in 4:23 in the exact same way as in the 1 John 3:18, where he says, “Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.” John is instructing believers not just to talk about love, but to live love out. That is, the truth of the matter is in the lived-out actions of our daily lives. John is pointing out that true worshippers will worship the Father in the way they live out their lives in the realities of everyday living—that true worshipper will worship the Father in reality.

It is interesting to note to whom Jesus is speaking in John 4:21–26 passage.  Jesus is not speaking to a sophisticated Jewish religious person, but to a woman, who is also a Samaritan. Interestingly, once Jesus revealed his Messiahship (v 26) and the woman had gone into town and told everyone that in fact Messiah was standing at the town well, then Jesus and this woman and many in the town proceeded to companion together for another two days for so.  The point being made here is that the purpose of discipleship is to move people into a companioning worship way of life with God Himself.

Other scriptures seem to support the notion that God desires a companion type relationship:
1. Matthew 1:23 points out that Mary, the mother of Jesus, is to know that this Son to whom she is giving birth will be called Immanuel, which means “God with us.” The implication given by the angel is that God intends his worshippers to companion with him.
2.Matthew 4:2–4 documents Jesus interacting with the devil after his forty days of companioning with the Lord through fasting and praying in the wilderness.
3. Mark 1:35–37 and 6:45-46 provide insight into Jesus’ pattern of pulling away from the regular interactions of the day to find at some solitude in which to interact and companion with God intimately.
4. Luke 5:16 points at the same: “But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.”
5.In John 10:7–21, Jesus states, “I am the gate for my sheep” (v. 7), and “I am the good shepherd” (v. 11), and “I know my sheep and my sheep know me” (v. 14). These metaphorical statements about how Jesus interacts in a companioning manner are “just as the Father knows me and I know the Father” (v. 15). What Jesus is getting at with his disciples is that he no longer calls them servants but friends (John 15:15).[3]

At the heart of this companioning relationship is the disciple’s desire to develop the character of Christ in their lives. In Matthew 22:37–40, the Lord himself explains that the ultimate purpose of life is to, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’  This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

Galatians 5:22–23 articulates how this companioning with Christ is demonstrated in daily living: But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.  Against such things there is no law.  Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.

It is important for those who are discipling worship leaders to realize that those being discipled should evidence the character of Christ in their daily walk. It is seen in how the artist interacts with others, develops relationships, and partners with other musicians in genuine ministry.   In fact, demonstrating the character of Christ is the ultimate goal of discipleship; and the ultimate indicator of whether or not discipleship has truly happened.

Those that focus on “companioning with God” will develop and grow as disciples that live Out The Commands of Christ. The seven commands of Christ referenced below may serve as a guide to discipling worship leaders and artists:

  1. Repent, believe, and receive the Holy Spirit (Mark 1:14–15).
  2. Be baptized in the baptism (or name) of Christ. (Matthew 28:19–20;
    Acts 2:38; Romans 6:3–4).
  3. Love God and neighbor (Luke 10:25–37).
  4. Break bread—which may also imply activities of worship (Matt 26:26-29).
  5. Regularly spend quality time in prayer (Matthew 6:5-10).[4]
  6. Give Money.[5]
  7. Disciple others (Matthew 28:18-20).[6]

Meeting God daily in His Word is a SECOND foundational habit healthy worship leadership must develop.  Jesus does not directly say the words, “study the Bible every day to be a good believer,” or “meet me in the Bible every day.”  But, Jesus’ entire life was centered around God’s Word, the Holy Hebrew Scriptures.

Deuteronomy 6:6-9, underscores God’s desire for His people to marinate in His Word: 6 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

God is serious about the practice of His believers meeting Him daily, repeatedly in His Word.  He told Joshua, in preparation for Joshua’s new leadership role as head of the people of Israel, “Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful” (Joshua 1:8).

The Church needs worship leadership steeped in God’s Word.  Every worship leaders must purpose to set their face and heart on meeting the LORD daily in His Word.

The THIRD practice foundational to discipleship is daily and regularly connecting with supportive relationships with fellow believers. Healthy Christian friendships, help us develop as mature disciples.  All disciples, especially worship leadership disciples, must purpose to nurture a set of solid friends from which they find strength, encourage, instruction, and correction (2 Tim 3:16) and accountability. Humans were created by God to live in community.  It is difficult for a disciple – especially one with an artistic personality – to develop and mature spiritually outside a community of faithful, loving, God-seeking brothers and sisters in Christ.

A FOURTH habitual practice that insures growth as a disciple is the regular serving of others who need your help.  This includes answering the call to evangelism, meeting the social needs in a community, and reaching out to people when they are hurting.  This is the act of “putting our good works into practice.”

Interestingly, Jesus Himself, on the very first day of His public ministry confronts Satan with the pronouncement,  “It is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God and serve him only.'”  (Luke 4:8).  And then toward the end of His public ministry he states, “I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.”  (Matt 25:40).  

The Apostle Paul writes, “. . . we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone.  . . .” in 1 Thess 5:14; and, “. . .  Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ,” in Gal 6:2.  Finally, it is recorded that the Early Church that,  “. . . they gave to anyone as he had need. 46 Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, 47 praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people” (Acts 2:45b-47).

The practiced habit of “serving” others on God’s behalf is one of the key ingredients in the recipe of becoming a healthy disciple.

[1] Edwards, Grant. First Steps One-on-One Discipleship: An Adventure for New and Renewed Believers. Springfield, OH: Specificity Publications, 2000; and Swimming + Lessons: How to Keep New Christians Afloat in a Sinking World.  Springfield, OH: Specificity Publications, 2010.

[2] Passages supporting this principle from the Gospel of John—1:1-2;  5:19;  7:28-29;  8:38a;  8:42;  8:58;  10:14;  10:27-30;  12:49-50;  14:9;  14;30-31;  15:10;  17:7-8;  17:25-26.

[3]  Other passages pointing to this same principle are: Luke 6:12–14; Luke 22:39–40; John 6:1, 56–59; John 8:54–59; John 10:22–30; John 15:4–13, 26–27; John 17:20–26.

[4] Matthew 6:5-10: 5 “And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. 6 But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. 7 And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. 8 Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. 9 “This, then, is how you should pray: “‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, 10 your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

[5] Five key passages about money for disciples to consider in their daily lives: Matt 5:42; 6:19-21; Luke 6:30-31; 6:38;.20:25.

[6] “. . . All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore as you are going (where ever and whenever you go) be making disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And know for certain that I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” (Authors translation.)

Discipleship Defined

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Discipling is the process of intentionally investing your life in the lives of others on God’s behalf.  This definition specifically comes out of two key NT passages related to the term disciple, one spoken by Jesus and the other written by the apostle Paul. In Matthew 28:18–20, . . . Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.

In 2 Timothy 2:1-3, the Apostle Paul articulates the mandate for discipleship in a clear, authoritative manner: You then, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus. And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others. Endure hardship with us like a good soldier of Christ Jesus.

There are several key issues every worship leader needs to know about these specific passages:.  First, Jesus called people to follow him, to obey him, and to reproduce others who would do the same.  In Matthew 10:1–2, Jesus called his twelve disciple to him and gave them authority to minister.  Though thousands clamored after Jesus, he called only a chosen few to be his disciples. They did not volunteer. They were called.

Second, the disciples responded to the call by following Jesus.  Matthew 4:19–20 says, “‘Come, follow me,’ Jesus said, ‘and I will make you fishers of men.’  At once they left their nets and followed him.”  Mark 1:16-18 says,

As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting (nets) into the lake, for they were fishermen.  “Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will make you fishers of men.”  At once they left their nets and followed him.  Jesus fully implied that a disciple was one that was called by him to follow.

Third, the dynamic process of obedience is a vital part of discipleship.  Jesus intended that the disciples follow and obey. In Matthew 28:20 Jesus tells his disciples to mentor other disciples, “teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you.”  Jesus makes similar statements in John 14:15: “If you love me, you will obey what I command.”  In John 15:10 he declares, “If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father’s commands and remain in his love.” 

Fourth, a disciple is a learner. In Matthew 28:20, the implication is that if the discipler is teaching, the disciple is learning. This involves learning how to apply daily lessons to life practices.

The Apostle Paul suggests that discipleship involves a type of imitation: Even though you have ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel.  Therefore I urge you to imitate me.  For this reason I am sending to you Timothy, my son whom I love, who is faithful in the Lord.  He will remind you of my way of life in Christ Jesus, which agrees with what I teach everywhere in every church.” (1 Corinthians 4:15–17)

Fifth, discipleship is a process.  A disciple is one who is called by the Lord, follows the Lord, obeys the Lord, and learns how to live a godly life from the Lord Jesus. That discipling process then involves  two-fold responsibility: 

The first responsibility identified with the process of discipleship involves the one discipling.  The one doing the discipling is responsible to hold in clear focus the process of discipleship.  Note Jesus’ intentionality in approaching the Father asking the Father whom he should disciple, and therefore who he should choose follow Him:  

One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God.  When morning came, he called his disciples to him and chose twelve of them, whom he also designated apostles. “You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last.  Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name” (John 15:16).

Jesus underscores the fact that God has intentionality involved in the discipleship process.  Acts 6:5-6 points out the same dynamic later on in the history of the Church.  The believers in Jerusalem were intentional in their selected for servant leadership:

They chose Stephen, a man full of faith and of the Holy Spirit; also Philip, Procorus, Nicanor, Timon, Parmenas, and Nicolas from Antioch, a convert to Judaism.  They presented these men to the apostles, who prayed and laid their hands on them.[1]

There are other biblical examples of intentionality on the part of a discipler to build into the lives of others who understood themselves to be disciples.  Old Testament examples include Moses discipling Joshua (Numbers 27:15–20) and Elijah pouring into the life of Elisha (1 Kings 19:15–16, 19).  New Testament examples include Peter pouring into the lives of ministry partners  (Acts 11:12ff), Barnabas discipling Paul (Acts 13:1–2) and Paul mentoring Epaphroditus and Timothy (Philippians 2:19-29).

The second responsibility identified with the process of discipleship involves the person being discipled. That person must be a willing learner, follower, and “doer of the Word.”  While it is important for the person doing the discipling to invest in the lives of individuals, it is equally important for the one being discipled to be a willing receiver.  A disciple must have a teachable spirit.  Note that those chosen by Jesus willingly followed. They did what they were told to do—they obeyed.  And, they sat a Jesus’ feet to learn.

A closer look at Matthew 28:18–20 provides an even broader picture of discipleship that may be applied to worship leaders. Note the main verb: to make. This verb should be understood as “be making disciples”—a present, active imperative.  It is a command. Many people incorrectly put the emphasis of this passage on the verb go. In the Greek language construction of this passage, the term go is actually one of the subsidiary actions; most clearly understood because it is not a command, but a participle. Therefore another translation of the verse would be (Jesus speaking): “Therefore, as you are going, wherever you go, whenever you go, because I know you are going all sorts of places every day, . . . be making disciples . . .”[2]

As a point of application, the Lord knows that everyone is going someplace every day, and his intent, by using a participle instead of a command verb, underscores the fact that in our daily lives,  we should always be discipling. It is important to understand that the main command is a present, active command. It is best translated as “be making disciples continually.”[3]  The clear biblical priority of discipleship is something one does at every stage and turn in ministry. 

[1] Other passages that point out this same dynamic of intentionality are:  Acts 15:40–41; Ephesians 1:4; 2 Thessalonians 2:13–15; 1 Peter 2:9–10.

[2] This rendering (translation) of the verse is the authors own translation—through looking directly at the Greek text and bringing out the nuance of the participles and main verb in a more clear way than is expressed in either the KJV or the NIV.

[3]  Again this rendering (translation) of the verse is also the authors own translation.